By: Rachel

Rachel — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 16:08:44 +0000

I find its really tricky to know what is right in today’s medical world of birthing. My first son was breech so I had a scheduled c-section - I spoke with childbirth educator (who was at Elizabeth Seaton and very pro-natural birth) who said that was my only option since the cord was wrapped around his neck twice, preventing him from turning. I was disappointed, but it seemed my only choice so I focused on my baby instead and the experience was strange but fine. For my second child, I really wanted a different experience so switched to a doctor that was supportive of a VBAC. I also hired a doula to help support me during the birth. The doctors were terrific with me and still weren’t even discussing induction when I my water broke at 41 weeks. When I got to the hospital I was already 6 cm dialated and seemed to be doing fine, but then labor seemed to stall - I think I only progressed another cm in 4 or 5 hours. It turned out that my water had not completely broken so they thought it might progress things to do this artificially. While that definitely brought on stronger contractions, it did little to progress things. Then they found out why - my son was presenting face first. They still let me go on for a few more hours before they decided to give me pitocin to help move things along. This eventually got things moving and after several more hours, I was fully dialtated and ready to push. Because of my son’s presentation, pushing was extremely painful but not productive so after several hours, everyone decided I needed to have a c-section. My son was never in distress and I was fine but exhausted after several hours of painful pushing with no progress. When decision was made for c-section, everyone seemed to agree that it was the best option - even my doula thought it best that I have the c-secion. She felt that my doctor had allowed me to labor longer and push longer than most would have in the same situation so I felt happy with my decision - at that point I was exhausted and in lots of pain as well as frustrated that for all my work, he wasn’t moving anywhere except more face forward and harder to move. During the c-section, they even asked to take a picture because his presentation was so unusual. As soon as I recovered, I became somewhat obsessed with analyzing the experience reading everything I could about face presentations and wondering if there was any way to have avoided the c-section again. I was proud that I tried a VBAC and labored so well without pain medication and got to experience all of labor except for actually birthing him but I still wondered if I could have had him naturally. My doula said she didn’t think so, but I still wonder if I had been on the farm or at home and had not had the interventions to speed my labor if he would have found a way to turn given the extra time. Or maybe a midwife would have felt comfortable trying to change his presentation internally which my doctor did not for fear of hurting his neck. I think I did the best I could have since I was having a VBAC which precluded birthing center and home birth options but I often wonder why that needed to be the case. While I am grateful for the healthy birth of my two boys, I still feel unsatisfied by my experiences and believe that things could have been different had we lived in a different time and place that does not medicalize birth so much. Had I known more at the beginning, I might have chosen a midwife the first time around and maybe everything would be different but I’ll never know….

Comments on: Whose Schedule Are We On Anyway?!

By: Rachel